Story Time 1000 & Where I Found Similar Events

Uncle Zoom

Premier Member
#1
If you happened to read my Circle City ride report from March, 2020, you may remember I met Hammy at the IBA Jacksonville party. And you may also remember that ten minutes after we were introduced he was writing out a certificate on the back of a restaurant placemat declaring I was clinically insane for doing the Indianapolis In-City SaddleSore. This, coming from a man who rode a scooter from Philadelphia to Florida. Nothing like trading insults to cement a friendship. Anyway, the point is... after talking with him over the three day event I discovered he had several approved IBA rides for people to do. I had never heard of them, because at the time I did not know about the Jason Jonas Ride Master webpage. So, while I imagine all the old timers are well aware, if you are among the unknowing like I used to be, you might want to check out https://rides.jasonjonas.com/ to see other riding opportunities, events and rallies.

While in Jacksonville, I talked with several IBA members who had accomplished Hammy’s Muffler Man 1000. They all liked it, so I gave it a try and I did as well. Hammy had another ride that caught my attention called Motovorian. Like the EggSanity, it is all about eating. However, instead of eggs and only eggs, on this ride you eat breakfast, lunch and supper at iconic restaurants. For instance, I went to Tony Packo’s in Toledo for lunch. This is the place made more famous than it already was by being mentioned in several episodes of MASH. But here’s the thing I don’t get. To date, I am the only one to do this ride. I find that strange considering all the posts about Rides to Eat and the EggSanity on this forum.

The SaddleSore I had the most fun with was Hammy’s Storytime 1000. To be honest, when I first read the rules, I didn’t quite get the gist of what it was about. And what do we do when we don’t understand something? We say, “Well that sounds stupid!” and we smugly ask ourselves, “Who would do this?” Well, I guess I would because I finally called Hammy and asked him what the heck this ride is all about. Once he explained it to my Kindergarten mentality, it wasn’t stupid anymore. In fact, I thought it was genius, so I planned the ride.

Here is the Kindergarten version of the instructions. (Make sure you read his adult version).

1 Give yourself a unique or strange name.
2 Get a stuffed toy or action figure that will represent you in each picture.
3 Then, before you go on the ride, you figure out the plot of your story. You will need to find things to photograph that represent:

Your Foe
A second minor foe
An ally to help you
An item that will conquer your foe
Some sort of peril you must overcome.

In my case, I became; Sir Fleeter of Short
I was represented by a stuffed Biker Bear in each photo
My foe was the Kokomantis
Minor foe was the Giant Rooster of Doom
My allies were Otis the Pink Elephant and Bird Boy, Lord of Flight
Item to conquer the foe was going to Gas City to obtain RAID
(Get it? Gas City, RAID) I know, don't quit my day job.
The peril was the Crown Point cemetery
AND… because I needed the extra miles I went to visit Superman.
So this is what it turned into

Photo 1, Ally #1, Fortville, IN,.JPG
Photo 2, Ally #2, Fort Wayne, IN Photo 2.JPG
Photo 3, Mini Boss, Warren, IN,.JPG Photo 4, Quest Item, (Found in ) Gas City, IN,.JPG Photo 5, Peril, Kokomo, IN,.JPG Photo 6, Antagonist, Kokomo, IN.JPG Photo 7, Friend of Fleeter the Short, Metropolis, IL.JPG Photo 8 Certificate.JPG

Anyway, the main reason I posted this is for all the members who may not know about the Ride Master webpage. There are plenty of rides and rallies that may peak your interest and keep you on the road. Ride safe!